Where did I go?

Updating here instead.

Boys becoming men, men becoming wolves

The two lines of this song that aired on 30 Rock a couple weeks ago have been stuck in my head ever since. Now I have a whole song to sing!

Here!

I decided to join NaBloPoMo in an attempt to make myself blog more than once every few months. I still haven’t really settled on a theme. Weight loss, of course, but I get bored writing about that constantly, and there are other things that I want to talk about too. I guess I’ll be random.

Just dipping my toes in the pool tonight in preparation to blog every day for a month. In November. Yikes. November is a crazy month for me at work. There will be lots of traveling, though nowhere far. Still I’ll have several nights in hotel rooms around the Pacific Northwest. Hopefully they’ll all have high-speed access. Of course they will. It’s 2007, and I’m not staying at the Motel 6.

To blogging! Cheers!

Two Tests

Tomorrow I have to drive about 200 miles to one of our other offices to meet and work with a new coworker. I’ll take her out to lunch (on the company, of course), which, I’ve already passed the restaurant test, so I’m not worried about that. Nor am I worried about the room service I’ll likely order later that evening. My big test is going to be the drive there.

Back in my smoking days, I didn’t munch on long drives, because I was too busy chain-smoking. But those days are long gone. No more stinky sticks for me, which would normally mean some sort of sweet or salty (or more likely both) snack for the drive. I can find my way around that. What I’m most pissed off about is that I can’t have a vanilla latte. Boooo! How will I stay awake? I guess I’ll have to find some sort of substitute. Perhaps an Americano with cream and sugar-free vanilla syrup. That could work. I should make a new mix CD for the drive as well. Something peppy. Oh, I love making mix CDs. Yay!

My other test will come at the end of the week. I make an effing killer (probably quite literally, if you eat too much of it) turtle cheesecake. I used to make it for every special event or holiday, but since I starting trying to lose weight, I haven’t made it. I promised my friend that I would make one for him as part of our joint birthday party. I don’t think it’ll be an issue to not have a piece. I don’t really like it as much as others do. I’m just going to have to be really conscious when I’m making it, otherwise I’ll end up licking the spoon/beaters out of habit when I’m making it. If I can get through that, I’m good to go.

Worlds Colliding

I had an interesting time with my boss and coworker Thursday. It turned out that it was just the three of us who went out. Well, then my friend showed up as well. She’s been wanting to meet my boss forever, because she’s heard stories about him, so I invited her along.

I was pretty sure that my boss would let loose a bit, but I had no idea how much. He didn’t even have his first beer down before he started complaining about how much he hates his boss. Heh. I suspected that was true anyway, so no big shock. I just can’t believe he told us. He was extremely candid about a lot of things that night… probably more so than he should have been. But it was definitely a bonding experience.

It was a little strange for me to have people from my work meeting people from my life. Certainly that’s not the first time that has happened. My boss prior to this one became one of my best friends, so she has met my friends and family. But these two are more Work Friends than Real-Life Friends, so felt the whole George Costanza worlds colliding thing, mostly because I’ve told my Real-Life Friend everything about the Work Friends, and she wasn’t shy about asking them about that stuff. And the Work Friends were all, “Oh my GOD, I can’t believe you told her that!” Everyone had a good sense of humor about it, so that was good.

As for me, I drank a whole lot of carbs. I was able to stick with raw veggies while everyone was eating appetizers, and I ate chicken and leafy greens for dinner, but I just couldn’t resist the micro-brews. Ahh well. It was easy for me to pick up the next day where I left off. Sort of. Once again, eating low-carb was simple, but I’m not supposed to have any alcohol at all for two weeks, but we always have Friday night drinks! Heh. At least I didn’t drink beer Friday. After this coming Friday, when two of my friends and I have a joint birthday party, I’ll do the entire two weeks without breaks for drinking. But not before then.

Feeling Better

I think I’m over the withdrawal period. For the moment, anyway. I’ll have to start all over again after tomorrow. See, my boss (who works in an office 800 miles away) is in town, and he wants to have department bonding over drinks tomorrow night, and I can’t say no to that. I can resist the chocolate and the potato chips and the fruit, but I cannot resist seeing my boss get hammered.

Yes, I suppose I could just go and sit there while everyone else drinks, but I’m not going to do that. I will try to find a low-carb friendly drink, and I will imbibe along with the rest of my department. I’m not going to overdo it, of course. I would much rather be the soberer one among the crowd, but I will drink. Which means basically starting the induction period all over again. That’s fine, though. I was planning to stay in induction well past the 14-day minimum, so it doesn’t feel like a huge setback.

Hopefully I won’t get all handsy with the appetizers that will surely be ordered for the table. The alcohol might make that an issue, but I think if I put it out there that I’m on Atkins, a) I’ll have the support of those around me, and b) I’ll be too embarrassed to eat the high-carb appetizers, because they know I’m trying not to. I don’t know if that’s the most emotionally healthy attitude, but there it is.

My Aching Head

I’d read that there was a possibility of having carb withdrawals in the first few days of the induction period, but to be honest, I didn’t really believe it. Or I didn’t believe it would happen to me, anyway. Hell, when I quit smoking, I did it cold turkey– no patches, no gum, no “just this one more”– and I never felt any sort of craving or change in my mood or behavior. Surely a lack of carbs wouldn’t affect me. I was very, very wrong.

Today was the worst. I had this massive power headache that would not go away. Ibuprofen didn’t help. Closing my eyes didn’t help. Finally I had a diet Coke, and that helped a little, so maybe it was symptom of not have caffeine. I was trying to give up caffeine for the induction period, but clearly that’s not working.

Beyond that, I just felt yucky all day. I could barely eat my lunch. My belly felt gross, like at any moment I could toss my sugar-free cookies. It wasn’t until I ate a piece of string cheese when I got home from work that I finally started to feel better. Well, somewhat better. The nauseated feeling is gone, but now I have stomach cramps.

But I shall persevere, this too shall pass, and all that stuff.

Here we go again

I’m changing my diet.  Again.  I keep trying different things.  Some work, some don’t.  I have enjoyed some success losing the healthy way.  Eat right and exercise, slow and steady wins the race… that sort of thing.  It’s the best way to go.  Except maybe not for me.  See, I need results.  I need to lose more than a pound a week.  Otherwise, I will get frustrated and I will fail.

I’ve tried to do this the way it’s supposed to be done.  It makes sense.  I want to lose it the right way, the way that gives me a better chance at long-term success.  I know the statistics that the overwhelming majority of those who lose the weight too quickly, gain it all back.  That has been a concern for me all along.

But now I’ve decided.. well, my exact decision was “fuck it.”  Right now my concern is losing weight.  I’ll worry about keeping it off when I get to the point where maintaining is an option and not just a distant dream.  I will deal with the current issue– actually losing the weight– right now.  One problem at a time.

I’m going the low-carb route.  I’m not doing Atkins exactly.  The plan is to just eat chicken or fish, as well as some leafy vegetables.  I won’t be eating bacon or cheese, because I’m watching the fat and calories as well.  Also, I’m not willing to completely give up Friday night drinks.  I’ll just make sure those drinks don’t get me all carbed up.

How long will I stick with it?  Time will tell, I guess.  This is my first day.  So far, so good, but it’s only 3pm, and my biggest downfall is evening snacking.  We shall see.